it’s His story…

Wow. Today was amazing.  And I’m worn out from it…  more to come.

I couldn’t sleep last night. And all day I’ve had a sad feeling… that feeling in your stomach that just won’t go away.
In the last week or so, I have heard of two young men that took their own life. While I don’t know their story or their circumstances, I can’t help but to grieve for them. What happened that was so awful that they didn’t want to live another day? Did they feel so alone that they thought they had no one to talk to? No one to help carry their load?
As followers of Christ, we are supposed to be transparent. Here’s me being incredibly transparent… I was at that low point several times in my life. (My friend says I have had a Lifetime Movie life.) The first few times, I have no idea how I got through it. Well, I actually didn’t… I lived in a constant state of numbness. Which I later realized, wasn’t really living at all.
This last time I hit rock bottom, a few years ago, I was lucky. A few months before it happened, I was introduced to someone who ended up saving my life. His name is Jesus. Had I not been introduced to Him, I have no idea where I’d be today. Certainly not where I am now. It was Him that listened to me when no one else was around. It was Him who gave me strength when I didn’t want to keep going. It was Him who kept me alive. It was Him who gave me hope. He healed me. He gave me a reason to keep living and to deal with the pain. He gave me life and a life worth living.
My heart is hurting for the people who feel like they have no one. Like there is no way out. That there is no light at the end of the tunnel.
I want to run in after them and hold their hand to lead them out into the daylight.
When I was in middle school, I was friends with a girl who had a more than “normal” troubled homelife. It would have been easier for me to be like everyone else and turn my back on her. No one wanted to be friends with someone who was always sad and always going through problems. But I stayed friends with her and to be honest, it was simply because I knew she had no one else. A couple of years ago, she found me on myspace. She told me that because of my friendship, I saved her life. Because I had not turned my back on her, I gave her hope. Because one night I called to check on her, she decided not to take the pills. I only say this because it was those simple acts of love and kindness that we can be intentional about that can save a life.
An intentional act of being Jesus to someone else… being a serial life-giver.
We know the best secret to life… His name is Jesus Christ. He is our Savior. Why would we not want to tell others about Him?? If we introduce others to Jesus, He will save their life. He gives us hope, a reason to keep living. I wish that those two young men had known. God is mighty to save…

Who do you know that needs to be saved? Have you introduced them to our Savior Jesus?

It is amazing what I learn from a 5 year old. I have nanny’d Madison and 12 year old Hunter for a year now and she has honestly become one of my best friends. We are family. I am so thankful that God put this family in my life and I have learned so much about Him through Madison. The things she says and feels and sees are so real and innocent… she hasn’t been tainted or jaded by life yet. A childlike faith… it’s contagious. And it’s better than anything else in the world.
Something I have learned over the past year- if you ask God for a chance to talk about Him with others, He always provides an opportunity. Last winter, I did just that before Madison got home from pre-k.  At the end of the evening, while Madison was taking her bath, she formed her fingers in a cross and asked me what the “church sign” meant. Wow! I explained to her that it was a cross and about God sending His son to die for us so that we could have a relationship with Him. Wide-eyed she asked me, “You wouldn’t give me up, would you?!” I replied, “That’s what is so amazing about God… He gave up His only Son for everyone! Pretty amazing, huh?!”
It is pretty amazing. He gave up His Son for people who would never give up themselves to accept His free gift of love and grace.
Last night on the way to gym class, we were listening to Todd Field’s new song “Let Me Sing”. Love this song!!!
The lyrics say,
“Let me sing louder than creation to You
for the pain You bore in Your body to bring my soul to You.
Let me shine brighter than the stars in the sky
an offering of praise all my life to You my holy King.
Let me sing…”
Then I hear Madison say, “I want to know what God looks like.” Wow. Tears came to my eyes. My heart melted.  We talked about how we do see God every single day. I said that He is everywhere… everything that makes us smile, everything that is beautiful, everything that is good. So, she starts by saying that the clouds are His brains and the trees are His body. I add that the stars are His eyes.
He is everywhere. He surrounds us and He is never gone from our sight. Never.  On the way home from gym class, she asked to hear the kids worship music. She has said before that she feels close to God in my car…. in my car? 
God, thank You for using me to reach a 5 year old.  And thank You for using a 5 year old to reach me.
Today when Madison got home from school, she said that ladybugs like her house and she sees them all the time. “They give me kisses”, she said. “It’s just like God is giving you kisses, isn’t it?” Big smile.
He IS everywhere, in everything, every single day.

Where do you see God? Have you seen His face?

I found myself on the side of highway 400 with a flat tire tonight.  It was 930, so it was already dark and cars were flying by.  Of course, at this moment I recall all of the tragic stories about people getting killed on the side of the highway and started to get a little nervous.  I know the steps of how to change a tire but I was not even about to attempt it with cars traveling at 70 miles an hour.  So I call 911.  When the officer arrived he informed me that he was not going to change the tire either because it was too dangerous.  DOT dispatched a HERO and the waiting began…
As I was sitting there, I began to look at it as a metaphor of life.  (This is what happens when you are an English major!)  I was in trouble and called for help.  My HERO arrived to save the day… he came with the full-sized car jack (that would never fit in a regular car), a power wrench, and an air comressor, all in his vehicle.  By the time he finally arrived (2 hours later), it took him less than 5 minutes to send me on my way.  He gave me the ability to leave on my own and even double checked the air pressure in my spare.  And for some reason, he kept apologizing!  He told me he was sorry for taking so long when he was the one who made it possible for me to get home safely.  Now that’s being rescued.
So, it’s kinda like my super hero.  Jesus comes when we call for help.  Actually, He’s always there with us.  He saved us all when He died on the cross for us.  He has given us the tools we need to survive and better yet, to live a true life though Him.  And He has given us more than we deserve, more than we need, and more than we could have ever imagined for ourselves. 

As Hillsong Kids sing, “Jesus, You’re my super hero.  You’re my star, my best friend!”

So… Who has rescued you?  Who is your hero?

So, it’s been awhile.  Life happened.  It’s crazy how much time can pass by without really realizing it. 
That’s my new focus.  To be intentional.  In everything I do.  My time, my money, my thoughts, my words, my actions. 
A few weeks ago, DW gave a message about being a serial life-giver, rather than a life-killer.  Those words rocked my world.  To be intentional about giving life to everyone who crosses my path.  A simple smile, an encouraging word, a helpful hand.  You never know how much what you say and do can affect someone else. 
Give LIFE. L- look for people to give life to; I- Immediately respond & don’t miss the opportunity; F- Follow up; E- Establish with those who feel forbidden.  DW told us to ask ourselves, “How can I benefit it?” rather than “How does it benefit me?” 
Imagine how much a person’s life could be touched if we were intentional about everything we did- not only things that we knew would affect others but in every aspect of life…  What we do overflows from our lives and pours out and affects others… Be intentional.

Are you a serial life-killer or a serial life-giver?